Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Cyclical

Well I would like to say thank you very much to everyone who left me a positive note after my last post. I didn't really do any blogging over the weekend trying to decide what to do about mrcds and the comments that are being left that I don't desire to pollute the blogosphere with. I have decided what to do, and I'm not going private.

I thought alot about why I blog and why I read blogs over the weekend. While there is the catching up and watching people's kids grow aspect; there is also something different that keeps me reading and writing. Just a few weeks ago I stumbled upon this blog and a post entitled "Surprise is not a big enough Word" while up in the middle of the night unable to sleep. I can't explain why but this post just put me at ease with so much guilt I had been carrying around. I don't want to sound full of myself, I do mean this with the utmost humility, but I write about my struggles on here and how I am working to overcome them quite honestly. I like to think, what if someone else facing a similar struggle can read these words and they can help? For that reason alone I wont go private.

However, since mrcds doesn't seem to feel the need to stop commenting I will be adding the comment moderator so I have to approve the comments before they show up. I'm not a fan of this option, but that's the way it's going to be because none of you great people should have to read this dribble.

I'm not sure if you may be saying to yourself "That's great Amanda, but how are you going to deal with the emotional smut still being put on you by mrcds as you'll still have to read their comments?" Well if you are, this is how I'm hoping to deal with that.

In the last comment posted by mrcds they stated: "Not to be mean but have you ever considered that I may be someone you know just trying to point you in a different direction. If I didn't care then I wouldn't comment. You do know me and I just can't face you and share the things I feel.". There are several options as to how I can react to this;

1. Do you really know me or are you trying to mess with my head by stating this?

2. If you do know me, do I consider you a friend? If I do consider you a friend then we need to have a coffee because friends don't treat friends like this. If you really do know me you'll know this is not the firs time I've stood up for what I believe in the face of opposing opinions. You know that I can handle talking to you in person.

3. If you do know me and we just 'know' each other then perhaps I can share a bit more with you. Maybe something about the language I use is a bit confusing to you as my intention in writing should not be for you to think any of those things you think.

So, mrcds, no one can see my comments left by you any longer. Let me know who you are and we can work out our differences, or at least part ways with a bit of closure.

Thanks again for all of the positive feedback, and especially to the first time commenters, I really appreciated it. I will be back in a few days once I'm not quite so fragile over these comments and back in my usual bloggin style!

17 comments:

Lamb said...

WAY TO GO, AMANDA!!!!!

karen said...

Good for you, Amanda.

Jen said...

Wow, I can't believe you know this person. Crazy.

Anyways- I'm glad you came to a decision that you are happy with.

Tara said...

I'm proud of you!

Mary said...

Good for you,
You have way more courage than I do and if this was a person I know I would hope they would talk to me first. YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wandi said...

If you do know this person, then I say what the????? Who would say such nasty things and be someone that you would know. Please do not listen to this person. They are full of shit! If I may be so blunt. You and your family are wonderful and your babies are beautiful. You know, it is comments like this that make me so angry cuz it spawns feelings of self doubt and insecurities in people. I am so proud of you Amanda. You must do what is best for you.

erika said...

i'm going to "delurk" now...my name is erika, i recently came across your blog. i truly give you credit for standing up for yourself and your family by continuing on with your blog. i agree with you- i believe people will continue to come across your blog and be encouraged by your posts, as well as may be an encouragement to you. i know i am encouraged. this whole thing w/ the 'anonymous' commenter just made me nearly physically ill. it is obvious (as many others have stated, too) that this person has many struggles w/in themselves and for some reason decided to take major aggression out on you, in my opinion. makes me very sad for you. i admire your strength and from what i've read/seen on your blog, you & your family are beautiful people. a true encouragement and inspiration. keep it up! thank you ;)

Angella said...

Oh, Amanda! I've been away and had no idea this was happening to you. The fact that you KNOW this person is sad, really.

They must not be a friend, because a friends would talk to you and not leave nasty comments like that.

Big hugs to you!!

Laughing for Life said...

Hi Amanda, Here is what I did to my blog when someone was being harrassing. I changed the blog address, and slightly changed the name, and emailed all my friends to tell them that. I also made sure that it wasn't listed in the google blogroll... check your settings to remove that setting. I wasn't getting nearly the nasty remarks you were getting, but I was being "stalked" by a guy I knew, both on the internet, and at home. And it was freaking me out (still does). I cannot believe the comments this person is making. If they really did know you, the comment about trying to point you in a different direction is so ludicrous.. how the heck does anyone respond to a different direction dictated by a blogosphere ignoramous who demeans, harrasses and BULLIES you and you family!!! Call this person what they are ... a blogosphere BULLY!!! probably has an incredibly small weany, so has to bully people behind the internet mask!!

ps. I knew you from CBC days and places.
Su-Ann

Bloggy Mama said...

Good for you. I hope that you find some closure with this story. Wishing you all the best, as you know...

Kim said...

YOU are a very courageous woman! I would have hidden my blog a way - God would be proud that you don't take after me!

Just because the person says they know you doesn't mean they do, really. It is clear from the things they say that, even if they have seen your face and heard your name, they really have no clue who you are. And they don't know much about life either. Your children will grow up to be wonderful adults who contribute tons more to society because they grew up in a loving home with strong morals and values that uplift other people and inspire them to be all they can be rather than slamming every little thing that they don't like about others (as Ms. McNasty obviously does, probably in person and with her family too). If you take a look around, you will find that it is not the people who grew up with all the money and things they ever wanted who make the world a much better place for the people in their lives.

So, keep on being real and honest as long as you are comfortable sharing and know that you make the world a much happier place for everyone who really does know you!

Love you tons!
Mom

KellyLee said...

I am glad my blog post brought you some relief. Who knew. So many people have felt connected to that particular entry. I am honored you did too.
As far as your mean commenter. That just sucks, really sucks, especially if they are alluding to the fact they are a real life friend. Good for you blocking them, they have no right to have their voice heard.

christy said...

Wow, I haven't been to your site in a few weeks and look at all this craziness! I certainly hope whoever the $**%@$* is will fess up. You are a brave woman. ANd your girls are beautiful and special. How could anyone say horrendous things like that over two of the Lord's precious unique creations. This is just beyond my brains comprehensions.
Sending you love...
((HUGS))

wandi said...

Good for you Amanda. Keep on blogging girl.

Susie said...

I am so happy that there is someone else out there that posts as honestly as I do. I do this because.... well I am a bad faker. I can't fake to be happy or not angry/ disappointed. I write and say what I feel 99 % of the time. Good for you for being so honest and open with people. After all, it is the only way we can truly get to know who each other are.
PS: Thanks for the wonderful comment on my blog- lately I have needed the reinforcement.

CARLA said...

I've just recently come across your blog but I just wanted to say congratulations for speaking the truth and standing up for yourself. I am also very saddened that this "mrcds" suggested that a "normal" person would... abort your baby? How incredibly offensive and sad!! Stay strong!! And keep being honest!

Gillian said...

Hi Amanda,
I stumbled upon your blog through Facebook a couple of months ago, and it has been so inspiring and really--it just makes my day! I feel that your thoughts and musings are sometimes just what I need to hear. Your struggles and triumphs have truely brought me closer to the Lord, and made me realize that everyone's not perfect, but they can still have a good relationship with God.
You don't really know me, but I was part of the Alliance Church in the 90s and was buds with Nick, Rory, Al, Derek...etc. You may have heard stories about my sometimes questionable youth, but through your blogs, I have felt that even though I may have made mistakes--everyone deserves to be forgiven. Maybe one day we will meet - you really seem like an awesome person!
Today I went to check your facebook blog and It wasn't there! I followed the link to this page and was so sad to read about your harasser. It takes a lot for you to post such intimate thoughts (knowing that any creep could be reading it), but I for one want to encourage you to continue...if only for bringing a little peace to me. Please don't go private, I really appreciate your encouraging thoughts. ;)
~ Gillian