Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Stumped

I am sorry to have left such a gap since my last post, but I find myself not sure where to go next. This is one of the areas in my life wherein I feel way too vulnerable to be completely transparent. The long and the short of it is that our family is in "that financial place" where people can't understand why I don't work, but our family is in that "focus on your children" place that people can't understand why I would work. It's this funky middle ground where we aren't chasing after possessions, but we aren't hugging trees either.

Add to that, a lot of what this journey has been for me has been about my faith in God and my relationship with him. Something that not a lot of people understand, or the people who don't understand are just more vocal. Putting Christ at the beginning, middle and end of everything I do is hard. It's another hard thing that is totally worth it; but God is often so quiet and the world is often so loud.

On top of which I am trying to become a better person, let's just put out the Open House sign for self doubt and temptation and exhaustion.

I promise I am not done sharing. I just need a few deep breaths before I get back out there.

4 comments:

Bloggy Mama said...

So proud of you for being so vulnerable.

Tara said...

take your time.

Lamb said...

BRAVO!!!!

What people do not realize is that being a wife and mother is the most important job in the world.

I used to get those funny looks and questions like "Just, what do you do all day?" duh

I was so happy to be home with my boys and wouldn't have missed one moment of it.

God bless you for saying that you are working on your relationship with God. Too many of us don't do that enough. How else are we going to be able to recognize when He lets us know what He wants us to do??

Hugs to everyone.

Amanda said...

I totally relate to you!!! Why can't we live closer together and get together for tea and talk about life. We really believe that me staying home to raise our kids is foundational.

I love reading your blogs, keep it coming!